What If I Don't Feel Like Being Thankful?

There are those weeks when I get on Facebook and I am bombarded with pictures of babies (totally guilty of this), posts about what someone ate for dinner (breakfast and lunch too), and "selfies" taken from every angle, with multiple expressions.  For the most part, I don't judge.  I don't care what you post.  I honestly like scanning through my feed and if what you post doesn't interest me I scan right past you, but I don't hate on you for it either.

This week, as I sat cozied up on my couch, I would pull out my phone and swipe through my news feed.  With several posts I felt my heart break.  Countless friends hurting.  Devastating news received.  Lives changed and altered forever.  I would pray for each one as I read them.  Then, that night or the next morning I would pray as well.  After a few days I started realizing that I couldn't keep track of all the pain and my prayer started sounding something like, 

"Dear Lord,

There are so many people hurting.  I can't remember all of their names and situations anymore, but you can.  Give them peace.  Let your angels stand guard around them.  In the hospital rooms, at the funerals, in their homes, please Lord, guard their hearts, give them peace that surpasses all understanding.

Amen."

In Paul's letter to the church at Thessalonica he says, "Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus" (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).  As I laid in bed, on this Thanksgiving morning, I felt this verse on replay in my mind.

ALWAYS.

CONTINUALLY.

ALL CIRCUMSTANCES.

GOD'S WILL.

Just how are we supposed to do that?  

My Uncle gets diagnosed and passes away from cancer.  Be joyful?

My Aunt gets diagnosed and passes away from cancer.  Pray continually?

A young family, going on vacation, gets in a car accident and they all get killed.  Give thanks in all circumstances, even this one?

It is incredibly easy to give thanks when we feel all of our wants and needs are being met.  However, the moment things start working outside of our desires, you panic, become angry, and want to start throwing stones at God.  Our heart breaks, we don't understand, and we start to want our will to be done, not His.  We want to conform His will into our will.

Why do we allow Satan's voice to be so much louder than the Holy Spirit dwelling inside?  We start questioning and doubting so quickly.  

Often times, I can almost hear that slithering serpent, whispering to me, in my quiet moments...

"If God cared, why didn't he heal them?  Why does he allow you to be in so much pain? Where is your 'god' now?"

I don't pretend to have the answers.  To be honest, there are times that I feel anxiety swarming all around me, filling me with panic.  I have felt depression after having both of my girls.  Isn't that just crazy that you can feel depressed after having such a blessing enter your world?  For some, that postpartum depression business is the real deal, and it's hard.  However, let me tell you what gets me through it, even if it's just baby steps.

Faith and Obedience.

Don't expect automatic, genuine joy when you receive bad news because more than likely, you probably won't have it.  Don't expect to be overwhelmed with thankfulness when you experience heartbreak.  It's not going to happen on your own.  These are reactions that are not natural for us and that is okay.  Don't put yourself on a guilt trip because you think, "Oh, I should feel thankful in this circumstance.  I should feel joyful, but I'm not. I just feel hurt, anger, and resentment."

Here's the deal.  It's not about what you feel.  Feelings fluctuate every hour (pretty much every second if we're being honest).  We are fickle beings.

In Hebrews 4:1-3 it says, "Therefore, since the promise of entering his rest still stands, let us be careful that none of you be found to have fallen short of it.  For we also have had the gospel preached to us, just as they did; but the message they heard was of no value to them, because those who heard did not combine it with faith.  Now we who have believed enter that rest..."

God promises us rest, but not based on what we "feel".  He gives us rest when we have faith in Him above and beyond what we can understand.  It is okay to say, "God, I don't understand. I feel anger and I feel sadness, but I have faith and belief in you and that is enough."  The more you say it, the more your feelings will catch up to your words.  Giving thanks keeps us in God's presence.

Bottom line, faith and trust in Him is shown through obedience.  Through that trust in His promises and word He will give you unexplainable joy and thankfulness, despite the circumstance.  His Holy Spirit fills the gap.  We just must be willing to take that first step, even when it goes completely against what we "feel".

This Thanksgiving I am of course thankful for my family, friends, and a roof over my head.  I am thankful for my husband's job and the fact that we have food in the fridge.  I am thankful for the doors that have been opened, since our move, when it comes to wonderful friends we have met, beautiful scenery, and an amazing church.  However, the thing that I am most thankful for is the hope that God gives us past this temporary life.  I love my life here, but my soul yearns for the time when I will spend eternity with God.  I am thankful that he provides opportunities for me to grow closer to Him in this life through pain, sorrow, and anger.  I am thankful that He can create a joyful heart, a prayer filled warrior,  and a thankful believer even when we don't feel like it.

Happy Thanksgiving All!

Where does your heart rest?

Now stay with me.  This is not a plug for a company or an endorsement for a product.  It has nothing to do with it.  That being said...read on.

I recently became a distributor for a multilevel marketing company.  From the endorsers, the research, personal stories of those close to me, and from my own personal experience I really like the product.  Since I started with the company I find my mind spinning, trying to find ways to share the product with others.  There are items that I have tried that really helped me and I want to help others with the difficulties they are having.  I may have a person tell me about something going on with them and I automatically think of certain products that may help.  I want to spread the word.  I want others to know about these products.  I want to "save" them from what ails them, giving them freedom, either physically or financially.

I think about being in the workplace.  Before my life as a stay at home Mom I was a teacher.  I would stay at school late, making my lesson plans, and attempting to make activities that would reach my kids.  I wanted them to understand the concepts.  My goal was to share knowledge with them that I truly felt they needed to know.

I see my husband's mind turning about his work, often times after work hours, as he creates and organizes presentations, events, and ideas.  He is always strategizing, trying to find the best way to convey his message to others. 

One night, as I spoke about the company to a friend, it dawned on me.

This is what I should be doing more of when it comes to Christ.

As I was thinking of ways to share this company with others I suddenly realized how my energy and direction was somewhat displaced.  While this is a good company and I should want to share it, how much GREATER is the creator of the universe and how much more vitally important is that message?!  True, this company may make you feel better, while you are in this temporary home in this temporal body, but the message of Christ is eternal.

Shouldn't we be staying up later, studying the word of God, and constantly searching out people to tell about Him?  In a multilevel company you hope to have others sign up under you so that in turn they will be able to share the products and the company with others.  Shouldn't our goal be to "sign up" others for Christ so that they will in turn share the living word to those around them?   With this company, they ask you to just share your story.  Share your experience.  As I was doing this I was thinking, "Wow, I need to be doing more of that when it comes to Christ, the message of forgiveness, and the joy found in a relationship with Him."  One product of Christ he has given me is forgiveness for all of my questioning, fears, and anxiety (Ephesians 4:32).  Another being an eternal hope and life in Him (John 3:16).  He gives me peace and strength right when I need it (Isaiah 40:29).  There have been things that I feared so much.  However, when I finally came to that moment He was already there.  

I sometimes think we just need a restart button.

We get so unbelievably distracted and tangled in what really doesn't matter that we lose sight of everything that truly does.

The things we do on this Earth are not in themselves bad at all.  This is not what I am saying.  We need work to help provide for our families.  We need people that work hard and show devotion in their workplace.  Our jobs and skills are a gift and blessing from God.  We just need to evaluate where our heart and focus lies.  Think about what is truly at stake.

By not sharing God and his work in your life you are depriving those around you that are lost and hurting.  Just like I want to share these products to help others, how much greater is the gift of salvation?  Yes, these products help your body here on this Earth, but then what?  What Christ offers is eternal life and without Him is eternal damnation.  If we truly believe this, shouldn't we be up late, working hard, trying to find ways to share this truth and hope with those around us?  I know my mind needs to be redirected, pretty much on a minute to minute basis.  

What is your focus?  Where does your heart rest?